Why I SHOULD have carried a gun

[Elizabeth Petersen]

Ok, so those of you who have been with TFL will recognize this, perhaps, as a "part II" of my other thread about why I Carry A Gun.

Recently, I retired from EMS, but have continued to work as a Crisis Intervention volunteer, specializing in assisting battered women and men who need help in leaving their abusive partners.

Today, myself and my partner ( a reserve officer with a local police agency) were called out to help a woman who had recently thrown her abusive husband out of the house. Our job was to interview her and her children, get her started on protective orders and help her through the entire process of breaking free from her abusive husband.

My partner was off interviewing the children in another room. I was in the kitchen, filling out paperwork with the woman. (Now, keep in mind, this woman had told us that her husband was in jail, which turned out to be incorrect. My mistake was not in verifying that information.)

To make a long story short, as I was interviewing this woman, the husband came home. Armed and angry.

Next thing I know, I'm looking down the barrel of a Ruger 9mm.

Not a damned thing I could do, being unarmed (as is the agreement with the crisis center I work with).

All I could do was negotiate with a furious man who had just informed me that I was just another "F-ing Wh*re" who he was going to kill.

Luckily, he didn't know that my PD partner was in another room, and was already on his cell phone requesting back up.

Longest ten minutes of my life. Nothing like the feeling of a gun barrel pressed against your head, while some lunatic is yelling about how he is going to kill you.

(Ok I am rambling here, but I need to blow off steam, as this agency I work for has no idea what a CISD - Critical Incident Stress Debriefing - is.)

Well, at one point I remember asking this guy that if he was going to shoot me, to please make it a chest shot, as I was sure my mother had her heart set on an open casket. This seemed to calm him a bit, and he moved the gun from my head to between my breasts. The bad part of this change of locale was that he started making noises about committing a rape/murder. Oh bugger...

About five minutes later (seemed like hours) PD responded. The guy heard the sirens and, to my utter amazement, he stepped back from me, tossed the gun out the open kitchen window, and then calmly walked out of the house and was arrested without incident.

(I am sure more must have happened during that time, but I'm drawing a blank.)

Long story short, I will NEVER EVER AGAIN go out, be it to the store, or responding on a call like this, UNARMED.

Despite what all the anti-gunners say, there was no way in Hell I could have ever talked that guy out of shooting me. His intention was pretty clear.

Only the intervention of other armed persons (PD) was sufficient to convince this nutball to give up.

Ok, done with my babbling. Thanks for letting me get this off my chest. Whew. Needed that.

(PS to Mike Irwin and Nightcrawler...thanks for listening.)

[Nightcrawler]

No sweat, Red. And thanks for listening to the thrilling tale of my weekend, what with my sitting on my butt and watching the televisor.

[Mike Irwin]

De nada, Dearie...

As I said, at least Fred & Clem are partially bullet proof...


Seriously, though.

There's a damned good reason why police consider domestics to be among the most dangerous calls they take.

I wouldn't consider walking into one unarmed...

[Tamara]

Yow!




Very glad you're still with us, EP!

If you go running off an' gittin' yourself kilt, I'm never speaking to you again!

[Elizabeth Petersen]

Thanks guys...you have no idea how much it means to me to be able to talk about it. whew.......

Yeah, Mike, good thing they are bulletproof. ROFL.

[Nightcrawler]

Fred and Clem, Red?

You're such a deviant.

[Powderman]

Dear God..................

Thank Heaven you got out of there alive. I hope you recover emotionally (it sounds like you are one iron-spined lady, so that should be no problem).

As for carrying, may I suggest a Glock 26 or 27? Feed it Federal Hydra-Shoks, and exercise it regularly.

There's nothing quite like coming out of something like that, and realizing that you're still alive and breathing, is there?

Glad you made it.

[Elizabeth Petersen]

You know, Tamara, I am very happy to be here too. And by GOD I will never go out unarmed again.

To those namby pamby, bliss-ninny MMM sob sisters who are convinced that you can just talk yourself out of situations like this, I say...

BULL[color=#FF0000]█[/color][color=#FF0000]█[/color][color=#FF0000]█[/color][color=#FF0000]█[/color][color=#FF0000]█[/color].

They need to be where I was just hours ago. Period.

[LawDog]

*blink, blink*

And here I was thinking that I had had a bad day.

Talk as much as you need to, Lizbet. We'll listen.

LawDog

[Mike Irwin]

You tell it, Sister!

At least you were processing clearly enough to think that you might be able to take a "bite out of crime..."

Unfortunatly, though, I have no doubt that most of the MMMers, if faced by that situation and extricated as you were, would only become MORE shrill in their calls for gun control...

I hate to think what might actually change their minds...

[Elizabeth Petersen]

Oh, not to worry, Powderman. From now on, I go escorted by Mr. Colt.

[Elizabeth Petersen]

Thanks, Law...

Now, as for explanation as to what Mr. Irwin is referring to, even unarmed, I hope I would have had the cajones to keep my wits about me and at least take a bit of the Terrasphere with me.

I'm STILL shaking. And it's been four hours.

I hope sharing this will convince EVERYONE who reads it of the importance of being ARMED, TRAINED, AWARE and READY.

[sm]

EP, glad your ok.

Have a family member going through this, 4 kids part of the deal too. The hubby is afraid of the men of the family especially me, the eldest brother. He saw me win a tourney once in my class - and I "make him uncomfortable"
I have done all I can, money, more money, time and support, contacts etc. I know how long 10 min can be waiting for the police to secure the house after hearing the noise and not being able to help. Not knowing what is inside. 10 min is an eternity.

stay safe.

[Elizabeth Petersen]

It's amazing what runs through your head during stuff like this...now I can understand what my LE friends mean.

My thoughts?

What about my children?
Will it hurt?
Doug, he's about to come home, what will he do?
I don't want to die this way.
WHY DON'T I HAVE MY GUN???
I hope it's a clean kill.
WHERE ARE THE COPS??
I hope he doesnt hurt those kids.
I AM SCARED.
Wish I had gun.
How can I disarm him?
Should I keep talking?
Can I talk my way out of this?

All that in the first 30 seconds.

[Nightcrawler]

It's an interesting question. What do you do when the bad guy draws down on you? Even if you have a gun, do you draw? Can you get yours out and get a shot off before he can? Do you try to take his gun away? Do you negotiate?

[Elizabeth Petersen]

Negotiate? I say to hell with that. If you're armed SHOOT THEM.

Negotiation might work to temporarily deter the loony tune who is bent on killing you, but in the long run, the only thing people like that understand is an armed response.

I can't stop thinking what would have happened if either PD had not shown up when they had, or if this nut hadn't decided to give up right away.

I can tell you what would have happened if my only recourse would have been negotiation.

Y'all would be reading my obituary. I have no doubt about it.

Argh...still ranting, sorry.

[ReserveCop]

I'm so happy to hear you are okay!

Have you ever considered also wearing "body armor" to these high risk domestic call-outs?

I think I would!

[Oleg Volk]

Glad you are alive and still sane. Happy that you won't be in this situation again.

[citizen]

Goddamnit, EP!!!!!

Don't know whether to hug you, or spank you!!

Taking a position where you're told not to carry and BELIEVING them!........(been there. done that. 'nother story.)

SHAME on you! AND I'm glad you're still with us.

PROMISE me you won't do THAT again!

And get some counseling! (wish I had)

Take some time; take a breath; and take care....of you.

[Walosi]

It's easy to pontificate, after the fact and from a great distance, but FWIW -

A friend, who has left these encounters on a gurney TWICE, advises that it is much better to walk away...even if you wobble. You done good, no matter how you feel about it now.

Lose the "ifs" and "what ifs" as soon as the brain cells stop swirling. They are fantasy, no matter how logical. Take a deep breath - breathing is reality.

A couple of hours on the range can be very theraputic - helps you come down from the adrenaline overdose, and helps you "re-establish self". Or some-such psychobabble.

Good on you. Keep on keepin' on.

[notbubba]

Mrs. Petersen

Thank God you're safe!

You've got more b@lls than me, just reading what happend made my balder go weak.

Please take care of yourself and vent as much as you want and need.

[WESHOOT2]

May I suggest that you fill yer pockets with guns? I know it makes me feel better.

Laws? Rules?
Ha!

I'm making it home; Darwin is my friend.
(Don't forget to watch out for metal detectors..........)

Next time?

[Dennis]

Beth,

Tell me, do your liability-fearing, subordinate-sacrificing, brave-with-others'-lives, nitwit supervisors require your reserve PD partner to be unarmed?

If so, and if he complies, you just GOTTA get a different line of work. Somethin' safer like, oh, I don't know, bomb disposal, going over Niagara Falls on a surfboard or something.

(I didn't know there WAS a higher number than ten on the pucker factor scale!! )

[LawDog]

postscript

The Latin in your signature is a hoot, Lizbet.

LawDog

[Long Path]

EP--

Gotta run to work here, (where they expect me to be armed, in less dangerous situations. Hm. What's that flavor? Oh, it's irony!], but I'm so very glad you're okay.

Quick recap--

You were confronted.
You did not panic (openly).
You did not startle him into further action.
Your partner did the right thing, in calling for b/u, and keeping the other members out of harm's way (did he evacuate them?).
You got him to consider your humanity (open coffin concept. Made him look at your face. Made him consider impact to your relatives.).
You survived.


You now have a plan to avoid this situation. Don't make this immediate plan permanent-- it takes a while. But don't give up.

The important thing is, you know what you can do. You know what you were capable of. That knowledge adds temper to steel already extant.

Thank gawd you're okay, friend.

--Matt