News from Canada, home of the even more oppressed than we...

MAD DOG · January 5, 2001, 10:05 PM

Canada is now officially FUBAR.
I was thinking of doing a carribou hunt in Canada some day, but screw them, they can keep their carribou.
Pity that a country founded by rugged individualists has depreciated to such a state of abject overgovernment.
Of course, once they have taken away all of the Canadian citizens guns, a troop of about 100 well armed and trained Americans could go up there and take the whole country!
Hell, my neighborhood watch group could do it.

Can you say Emminent Domain?
I got your Monroe doctrine... RIGHT HERE!!
Whatta ya say guys, want to loot and pillage a bit in the great white north as we make it safe for democracy?

January 5, 2001, CANADA: The Canadian government has issued new requirements
for travelers taking firearms into the country. Under the new Firearms Act,
visitors who do not have a current Canadian firearms license must report their
firearms to customs agents at the border, complete a non-resident Declaration
Form (in triplicate), have it confirmed by a customs officer, and pay a $50
(Canadian) fee. Once confirmed, the Declaration Form will act as a temporary
license and registration certificate valid for 60 days, and may be renewed at
any time during a 12-month period without paying an additional fee. Visitors
who intend to borrow a firearm while in Canada must obtain a Temporary
Borrowing License for $30 (Canadian) that must be completed before arrival in
the country.
A confirmed Declaration Form and/or Temporary Borrowing License are required
for visitors to purchase ammunition while in Canada. The non-resident
Declaration Form is available at the border, or by calling 1-800-731-4000, or
at http://www.cfc.gc.ca under "visitors." The Borrower's form is available at the
above number or at http://www.cfc.gc.ca under "visitors."

The Canadian government warns visitors with firearms that they are subject to
the same safe storage and transportation regulations as resident firearm
owners, are prevented from bringing in certain firearms prohibited in Canada,
and that certain restricted firearms require an Authorization to Transport
form before arriving at the border.

-- as reported by the NSSF

mcneill · January 5, 2001, 10:28 PM

I visited Canada once about 10 years ago. We were at Glacier Nat'l Park and the wife wanted to go across the border to Banff. The nice man at the Canadian customs said I could not take the .357 with me into Canada but could leave it locked up with him until we came back through the check-point. I was so nervous without a sidearm we only stayed in Canada for about two hours. Don't plan to go back. You're right - FUBAR.

Mike Davies · January 5, 2001, 11:49 PM

MAD DOG:
100 well armed and trained Americans...let's see..quick check here..yep..my $US99 M1 Garand's lubed...10 clips of .30-06 in my M1923 cartridge belt, and a bandoleer. 'Kay...BRING IT ON!!!

)
Keep the faith, mate...this insanity can't endure much longer. Folks are starting to get mad. Yep...angry Canadians..who'd a thought it.
Mike

Mike Davies · January 5, 2001, 11:54 PM

mcneill:
Here's an irony for you...I can freely take my handguns over the Canada-US border both ways. And I live in Canada...go figure.
Mike

George Hill · January 6, 2001, 01:02 AM

Mad Dog - on your way North - stop by Utah to pick me up.
I've got beef with them and that friggen Ham/Bacon deal - Its time for pay back!

Mike Davies · January 6, 2001, 12:13 PM

George:
Friggin' Bacon/Ham deal?
You mean to say that Canada managed to screw the Americans for once?

Geez, we send you all our water, lumber and electricity; we build your cars for you, we make DuPont powder for you...which Canadians have to import from the US if we want to buy it.

On your way over the line, don't forget to pick up your $30 license...just bear in mind that all these applications from US Citizens for the license to hunt with a firearm are reportedly being made available to the BATF for their perusal....the rot never stops.
Mike

MAD DOG · January 6, 2001, 01:17 PM

Granted, Canada has some redeeming features.
Cheap labor, lumber and power and an easily cowed populace that is evidently easy to control.
Once we take it over, we can expect to make a fortune selling them off to the Japanese.
First, we get the French Canadians on a boat back to France and we can also declare war on England, in armed protest of their treatment of the Irish and Scots over the last 900 years.
Then, we can get on with the purges.
Mitterand and his entire cabinet will be hung after suitable confessions have been signed.
All of those damned Socialists have to GO!
Then, we blow up their "breweries" where they make "beer" that invariably tastes like dishwashing detergent.
The Mounties will sent to special "summer camps" where they can be "re-educated". They will be forced to brew (and drink) decent beer in the American/German styles while they are retrained in political correctness.
Any Canadians that refuse to bear arms for our noble cause will be exiled to Kalifornia or Washington DC.
Newfoundland will be prophylactically nuked on general eugenic principles.

George Hill will be appointed Minister of Pork Products.
Rich Lucibella will be appointed Minister of Finance and Propaganda.
Ashley Emerson will be appointed Minister of Wildlife Management.

EARTH FIRST! We can log the other planets later...

Mad Dog
Future President (for life) of the New Republic of Canada.

BTW: Anyone have any good Spotted Owl recipes?

George Hill · January 6, 2001, 01:48 PM

Quote:

Geez, we send you all our water, lumber and electricity; we build your cars for you, we make DuPont powder for you...which Canadians have to import from the US if we want to buy it.

The only reason I haven't had to come up there all ready...

Spotted Owl?
Tastes like chicken...

Caeca Invidia Es · January 6, 2001, 01:56 PM

Ya think an invasion of Canada after all the civilian owned guns are gone will make America relise why we need them?

George Hill · January 6, 2001, 02:05 PM

I think so... They couldnt stop us.
Canadian military aviation consists of 2 F18, 1 KC135 tanker, 3 C130s and a Cessna.
Navy, 1 30 foot fishing boat and a dingy.
Marines, the 5 Swappys on the fishing boat.
Army, 25 fur hat wearing lumberjacks with 7MM Magnums... Tough guys for sure - I dont want to mess with them... but I bet we could get them to come over to our side with a case of Molsen and a Lorcin for each of them.

**Rich Lucibella** · January 6, 2001, 02:44 PM

To Our Canadian Brethren:
TFL disavows all association with these brigands. If appointed, however, I won't turn down the offer of Ministry of Finance and Propaganda, however. Once I own the money and the minds, Emperor for Life is just one baby step away.

[privacy mode]
Mr. Dog-
When do we take their women?
[/privacy mode]
Rich

**4V50 Gary** · January 6, 2001, 02:59 PM

Does anybody sense that the Canadian Provisional Government in Exile is undergoing interal power struggles?

Sodbuster · January 6, 2001, 03:03 PM

Who makes up these names for government documents? "Temporary Borrowing License?" Get out of town. It sounds like the Monty Python group (Ministry of Silly Walks) is in charge up North. Can we assess the Klintonistas a Borrowing Charge for using the Constitution, but returning it in a dilapidated condition?

Bubba · January 6, 2001, 04:36 PM

Pssssttt.... Rich... I've dated some of their women.... we don't want them....

Bubba

MAD DOG · January 6, 2001, 06:34 PM

Bubba,
Throwing caution to the north winds now, I was going to comment earlier on the ungainly draft animals and sled dogs that the Canadians pass off as women, but thought better of it. Ever heard "You can dress a pig up, but you can't make it sing"? Well, the Canadians have been attempting this for decades now.
Many of Canadian women are wounded during moose season every year, in cases of mistaken (moosetaken?) identity...

Rich,
[privacy mode]
Now that Bubba and the others are out of the running for the Canadian chicks, there will be more for us. Naturally, we grab all we can as soon as we get there, and then sort them for quality after things settle down a bit.

We will send the ugly ones to Texas where they can compete in beauty contests, and win big. BWAHAHAHAHA!
BTW, even if I make you Minister of Finance and Propaganda, I am going to keep my grubby little mitts firmly on the national purse strings. I know you! You would just blow it all in the strip clubs, bars and on crappy German SUVs.

Come to think of it though, having state run strip clubs would be kinda cool.
I think I will appoint myself Minister of Hankypanky, as well as President for life.
Mad Dog
[/privacy mode]

Mike Davies · January 6, 2001, 08:27 PM

Boy...you guys crack me up.
I would suggest a more beneficial arrangement for all would be for Canada to declare war on the US. After a few token skirmishes, we could surrender, and you guys would then pour BILLIONS into Canada, rebuilding our shattered nation...
BTW, Oh Members Of The Great Society:..I've driven from the Canadian border down through Washington and Oregon to get to the only three places worth driving to in the States: Vegas, Reno and Disneyland...
Talk about "Deliverance"...

Saw a great bumper sticker down in Oregon, though:
"Next Time You Need Toilet Paper, Try Using A Spotted Owl"
As for wimmin...when was the last time you guys actually noticed the size of the BUTTS on YER wimmin? Mind you, the guys aren't far "behind", so it's a relative thing, I guess....

Rich: Your Excellency!! Don't forget all the LITTLE people up here who would throw rose petals in your path when you become Emperor. Will you allow same-keyed trigger locks? Rummaging through 20 or 30 keys to unlock one gun is a REAL PITA.
Mike, B.C.: (where REAL men use brake grease on their M1 op-rods)

mcneill · January 6, 2001, 08:57 PM

MadDog - Don't mess with Texas!

mussi · January 6, 2001, 09:10 PM

I'm sure we can find 500 Swiss who emigrated to Canada for some
reason. We'll smuggle SIG 550's into country and then stage a coup
d'etat. That's when the Swiss Army will hit home with full force, and
stick the heads of the liberal environmentalist tree-hugger whackos on
poles.

If we had more available, we'd use HALBERDS.

suvdrvr · January 6, 2001, 09:49 PM

All post regarding Canada must from hence forth be posted both in anglo and franco, it's the law up there eh!

George Hill · January 6, 2001, 10:28 PM

French?!
Just another reason to go quickly.

If its okay - once we take control - I dont want to be Minister of anything.
I want to carve out my own Fifdome and create a fuedal warlord system over in the BC end of things. Castles. Canada needs Castles and War Lords.
Canadian women are not that bad - They just have to shave more often.

**Rich Lucibella** · January 7, 2001, 12:02 AM

MD-
ROTFLMFAO!!! with apologies to Texans, Canadians and Nebraskans everywhere. (The Nebraskans have only been included because we've not yet cracked on them....and because I've sampled your women!

)

Can somebody please close this thread before I hurt myself!

Rich

Rmf33 · January 7, 2001, 11:06 AM

Hee hee ;-)! You guys made my day!
bob

Mike Davies · January 7, 2001, 06:06 PM

mussi:
Now THERE'S a sight I'd like to see:
500 Swiss with their Halberds jammed up their kysters

Bubba · January 8, 2001, 12:37 PM

Bubba starts looking for that "Crosspost" option in the new software...... I'm SURE Teryl would want to read about this Minister of Hankypanky thing... Since she busted us both on that Model testing scam I tried to run for the calendar.... And I'll STILL put those two Texas beauties from across the hall against anything the Canucks have.

Bubba

Mike Davies · January 8, 2001, 01:47 PM

Bubba:
Now, I can't say that I've ever met a Texan, or been to Texas...but I've seen lotsa movies 'bout 'em...you ABSOLUTELY sure that y'all are talking about your women, and not your horses?

Shania Twain's Canadian...and she owns guns. So's Pamela Lee Anderson. She doesn't NEED guns.

January 5, 2001, 10:28 PM	#2
mcneill Senior Member Join Date: November 1, 2000 Location: Texas Hill Country Posts: 288	I visited Canada once about 10 years ago. We were at Glacier Nat'l Park and the wife wanted to go across the border to Banff. The nice man at the Canadian customs said I could not take the .357 with me into Canada but could leave it locked up with him until we came back through the check-point. I was so nervous without a sidearm we only stayed in Canada for about two hours. Don't plan to go back. You're right - FUBAR. __________________ NRA Patron; TSRA Life; NMLRA; JPFO; SAS Associate "His name was Jeremiah Johnson, and he wanted to be a mountain man. ... He was looking for a Hawken gun, .50 caliber or better. He settled for a .30, but d*** it was a genuine Hawken. You couldn't go no better."

January 6, 2001, 01:56 PM	#9
Caeca Invidia Es Staff Alumnus Join Date: November 18, 1999 Location: Earth Posts: 834	Ya think an invasion of Canada after all the civilian owned guns are gone will make America relise why we need them? __________________ MOLON LABE! I don't approve of political jokes, I've seen too many of them get elected.

January 6, 2001, 08:57 PM	#17
mcneill Senior Member Join Date: November 1, 2000 Location: Texas Hill Country Posts: 288	MadDog - Don't mess with Texas! __________________ NRA Patron; TSRA Life; NMLRA; JPFO; SAS Associate "His name was Jeremiah Johnson, and he wanted to be a mountain man. ... He was looking for a Hawken gun, .50 caliber or better. He settled for a .30, but d*** it was a genuine Hawken. You couldn't go no better."

January 6, 2001, 09:10 PM	#18
mussi Senior Member Join Date: January 17, 2000 Location: Berne, Switzerland Posts: 757	The 'Swiss' Canadians I'm sure we can find 500 Swiss who emigrated to Canada for some reason. We'll smuggle SIG 550's into country and then stage a coup d'etat. That's when the Swiss Army will hit home with full force, and stick the heads of the liberal environmentalist tree-hugger whackos on poles. If we had more available, we'd use HALBERDS.

January 6, 2001, 09:49 PM	#19
suvdrvr Member Join Date: November 25, 2000 Location: Pacific Northwest Posts: 59	All post regarding Canada must from hence forth be posted both in anglo and franco, it's the law up there eh! __________________ "They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." --Benjamin Franklin

January 5, 2001, 10:05 PM	#1
MAD DOG Senior Member Join Date: October 13, 1998 Location: Arizona. Posts: 853	Canada is now officially FUBAR. I was thinking of doing a carribou hunt in Canada some day, but screw them, they can keep their carribou. Pity that a country founded by rugged individualists has depreciated to such a state of abject overgovernment. Of course, once they have taken away all of the Canadian citizens guns, a troop of about 100 well armed and trained Americans could go up there and take the whole country! Hell, my neighborhood watch group could do it. Can you say Emminent Domain? I got your Monroe doctrine... RIGHT HERE!! Whatta ya say guys, want to loot and pillage a bit in the great white north as we make it safe for democracy? January 5, 2001, CANADA: The Canadian government has issued new requirements for travelers taking firearms into the country. Under the new Firearms Act, visitors who do not have a current Canadian firearms license must report their firearms to customs agents at the border, complete a non-resident Declaration Form (in triplicate), have it confirmed by a customs officer, and pay a $50 (Canadian) fee. Once confirmed, the Declaration Form will act as a temporary license and registration certificate valid for 60 days, and may be renewed at any time during a 12-month period without paying an additional fee. Visitors who intend to borrow a firearm while in Canada must obtain a Temporary Borrowing License for $30 (Canadian) that must be completed before arrival in the country. A confirmed Declaration Form and/or Temporary Borrowing License are required for visitors to purchase ammunition while in Canada. The non-resident Declaration Form is available at the border, or by calling 1-800-731-4000, or at http://www.cfc.gc.ca under "visitors." The Borrower's form is available at the above number or at http://www.cfc.gc.ca under "visitors." The Canadian government warns visitors with firearms that they are subject to the same safe storage and transportation regulations as resident firearm owners, are prevented from bringing in certain firearms prohibited in Canada, and that certain restricted firearms require an Authorization to Transport form before arriving at the border. -- as reported by the NSSF

January 5, 2001, 11:49 PM	#3
Mike Davies Senior Member Join Date: April 8, 2000 Location: Vancouver, Canada Posts: 376	MAD DOG: 100 well armed and trained Americans...let's see..quick check here..yep..my $US99 M1 Garand's lubed...10 clips of .30-06 in my M1923 cartridge belt, and a bandoleer. 'Kay...BRING IT ON!!! ) Keep the faith, mate...this insanity can't endure much longer. Folks are starting to get mad. Yep...angry Canadians..who'd a thought it. Mike

January 5, 2001, 11:54 PM	#4
Mike Davies Senior Member Join Date: April 8, 2000 Location: Vancouver, Canada Posts: 376	mcneill: Here's an irony for you...I can freely take my handguns over the Canada-US border both ways. And I live in Canada...go figure. Mike

January 6, 2001, 01:02 AM	#5
George Hill Staff Alumnus Join Date: October 14, 1998 Location: North Carolina Posts: 11,546	Mad Dog - on your way North - stop by Utah to pick me up. I've got beef with them and that friggen Ham/Bacon deal - Its time for pay back!

January 6, 2001, 12:13 PM	#6
Mike Davies Senior Member Join Date: April 8, 2000 Location: Vancouver, Canada Posts: 376	George: Friggin' Bacon/Ham deal? You mean to say that Canada managed to screw the Americans for once? Geez, we send you all our water, lumber and electricity; we build your cars for you, we make DuPont powder for you...which Canadians have to import from the US if we want to buy it. On your way over the line, don't forget to pick up your $30 license...just bear in mind that all these applications from US Citizens for the license to hunt with a firearm are reportedly being made available to the BATF for their perusal....the rot never stops. Mike

January 6, 2001, 01:17 PM	#7
MAD DOG Senior Member Join Date: October 13, 1998 Location: Arizona. Posts: 853	Granted, Canada has some redeeming features. Cheap labor, lumber and power and an easily cowed populace that is evidently easy to control. Once we take it over, we can expect to make a fortune selling them off to the Japanese. First, we get the French Canadians on a boat back to France and we can also declare war on England, in armed protest of their treatment of the Irish and Scots over the last 900 years. Then, we can get on with the purges. Mitterand and his entire cabinet will be hung after suitable confessions have been signed. All of those damned Socialists have to GO! Then, we blow up their "breweries" where they make "beer" that invariably tastes like dishwashing detergent. The Mounties will sent to special "summer camps" where they can be "re-educated". They will be forced to brew (and drink) decent beer in the American/German styles while they are retrained in political correctness. Any Canadians that refuse to bear arms for our noble cause will be exiled to Kalifornia or Washington DC. Newfoundland will be prophylactically nuked on general eugenic principles. George Hill will be appointed Minister of Pork Products. Rich Lucibella will be appointed Minister of Finance and Propaganda. Ashley Emerson will be appointed Minister of Wildlife Management. EARTH FIRST! We can log the other planets later... Mad Dog Future President (for life) of the New Republic of Canada. BTW: Anyone have any good Spotted Owl recipes?

January 6, 2001, 02:05 PM	#10
George Hill Staff Alumnus Join Date: October 14, 1998 Location: North Carolina Posts: 11,546	I think so... They couldnt stop us. Canadian military aviation consists of 2 F18, 1 KC135 tanker, 3 C130s and a Cessna. Navy, 1 30 foot fishing boat and a dingy. Marines, the 5 Swappys on the fishing boat. Army, 25 fur hat wearing lumberjacks with 7MM Magnums... Tough guys for sure - I dont want to mess with them... but I bet we could get them to come over to our side with a case of Molsen and a Lorcin for each of them.

January 6, 2001, 02:44 PM	#11
Rich Lucibella Staff Join Date: October 6, 1998 Location: South Florida Posts: 10,229	To Our Canadian Brethren: TFL disavows all association with these brigands. If appointed, however, I won't turn down the offer of Ministry of Finance and Propaganda, however. Once I own the money and the minds, Emperor for Life is just one baby step away. [privacy mode] Mr. Dog- When do we take their women? [/privacy mode] Rich

January 6, 2001, 02:59 PM	#12
4V50 Gary Staff Join Date: November 2, 1998 Location: Colorado Posts: 21,841	Does anybody sense that the Canadian Provisional Government in Exile is undergoing interal power struggles?

January 6, 2001, 03:03 PM	#13
Sodbuster Senior Member Join Date: September 26, 1999 Location: Wyo-Tana Posts: 1,298	Who makes up these names for government documents? "Temporary Borrowing License?" Get out of town. It sounds like the Monty Python group (Ministry of Silly Walks) is in charge up North. Can we assess the Klintonistas a Borrowing Charge for using the Constitution, but returning it in a dilapidated condition?

January 6, 2001, 04:36 PM	#14
Bubba Senior Member Join Date: October 10, 1998 Location: Pflugerville, TX Posts: 280	Pssssttt.... Rich... I've dated some of their women.... we don't want them.... Bubba

January 6, 2001, 06:34 PM	#15
MAD DOG Senior Member Join Date: October 13, 1998 Location: Arizona. Posts: 853	Bubba, Throwing caution to the north winds now, I was going to comment earlier on the ungainly draft animals and sled dogs that the Canadians pass off as women, but thought better of it. Ever heard "You can dress a pig up, but you can't make it sing"? Well, the Canadians have been attempting this for decades now. Many of Canadian women are wounded during moose season every year, in cases of mistaken (moosetaken?) identity... Rich, [privacy mode] Now that Bubba and the others are out of the running for the Canadian chicks, there will be more for us. Naturally, we grab all we can as soon as we get there, and then sort them for quality after things settle down a bit. We will send the ugly ones to Texas where they can compete in beauty contests, and win big. BWAHAHAHAHA! BTW, even if I make you Minister of Finance and Propaganda, I am going to keep my grubby little mitts firmly on the national purse strings. I know you! You would just blow it all in the strip clubs, bars and on crappy German SUVs. Come to think of it though, having state run strip clubs would be kinda cool. I think I will appoint myself Minister of Hankypanky, as well as President for life. Mad Dog [/privacy mode]

January 6, 2001, 08:27 PM	#16
Mike Davies Senior Member Join Date: April 8, 2000 Location: Vancouver, Canada Posts: 376	Boy...you guys crack me up. I would suggest a more beneficial arrangement for all would be for Canada to declare war on the US. After a few token skirmishes, we could surrender, and you guys would then pour BILLIONS into Canada, rebuilding our shattered nation... BTW, Oh Members Of The Great Society:..I've driven from the Canadian border down through Washington and Oregon to get to the only three places worth driving to in the States: Vegas, Reno and Disneyland... Talk about "Deliverance"... Saw a great bumper sticker down in Oregon, though: "Next Time You Need Toilet Paper, Try Using A Spotted Owl" As for wimmin...when was the last time you guys actually noticed the size of the BUTTS on YER wimmin? Mind you, the guys aren't far "behind", so it's a relative thing, I guess.... Rich: Your Excellency!! Don't forget all the LITTLE people up here who would throw rose petals in your path when you become Emperor. Will you allow same-keyed trigger locks? Rummaging through 20 or 30 keys to unlock one gun is a REAL PITA. Mike, B.C.: (where REAL men use brake grease on their M1 op-rods)

January 6, 2001, 10:28 PM	#20
George Hill Staff Alumnus Join Date: October 14, 1998 Location: North Carolina Posts: 11,546	French?! Just another reason to go quickly. If its okay - once we take control - I dont want to be Minister of anything. I want to carve out my own Fifdome and create a fuedal warlord system over in the BC end of things. Castles. Canada needs Castles and War Lords. Canadian women are not that bad - They just have to shave more often.

January 7, 2001, 12:02 AM	#21
Rich Lucibella Staff Join Date: October 6, 1998 Location: South Florida Posts: 10,229	MD- ROTFLMFAO!!! with apologies to Texans, Canadians and Nebraskans everywhere. (The Nebraskans have only been included because we've not yet cracked on them....and because I've sampled your women! ) Can somebody please close this thread before I hurt myself! Rich

January 7, 2001, 11:06 AM	#22
Rmf33 Senior Member Join Date: November 6, 2000 Location: Nacogdoches, Texas Posts: 126	Hee hee ;-)! You guys made my day! bob __________________ Illegitimi non Carborundum “There are two types of people; those that try to get you to do something that you'd rather not, and all others.” NRA Lifer TFL Alumnus

January 7, 2001, 06:06 PM	#23
Mike Davies Senior Member Join Date: April 8, 2000 Location: Vancouver, Canada Posts: 376	mussi: Now THERE'S a sight I'd like to see: 500 Swiss with their Halberds jammed up their kysters

January 8, 2001, 12:37 PM	#24
Bubba Senior Member Join Date: October 10, 1998 Location: Pflugerville, TX Posts: 280	Bubba starts looking for that "Crosspost" option in the new software...... I'm SURE Teryl would want to read about this Minister of Hankypanky thing... Since she busted us both on that Model testing scam I tried to run for the calendar.... And I'll STILL put those two Texas beauties from across the hall against anything the Canucks have. Bubba

January 8, 2001, 01:47 PM	#25
Mike Davies Senior Member Join Date: April 8, 2000 Location: Vancouver, Canada Posts: 376	Bubba: Now, I can't say that I've ever met a Texan, or been to Texas...but I've seen lotsa movies 'bout 'em...you ABSOLUTELY sure that y'all are talking about your women, and not your horses? Shania Twain's Canadian...and she owns guns. So's Pamela Lee Anderson. She doesn't NEED guns.